Women's Stories

Lisa See's Shanghai Girls is not only itself a story about two women - sisters Pearl and May - but also a testament to the power of women's stories.

Early in the book, Pearl and May draw strength, as they flee from war-torn Shanghai, from their mother's story about the moon sisters. Mama had, in turn, listened to and learned from her own mother's stories.

As the novel nears its conclusion, Pearl, as the book's narrator, reaffirms the significance of women telling one another their stories:

So often we're told that women's stories are unimportant. After all, what does it matter what happens in the main room, in the kitchen, or in the bedroom? Who cares about the relationships between mother, daughter, and sister? A baby's illness, the sorrows and pains of childbirth, keeping the family together during war, poverty, or even in the best of days are considered small and insignificant compared with the stories of men, who fight against nature to grow their crops, who wage battles to secure their homelands, who struggle to look inward in search of the perfect man. We're told that men are strong and brave, but I think women know how to endure, accept defeat, and bear physical and mental agony much better than men. ...

If we hear that women's stories are insignificant, then we're also told that good things always come in pairs and bad things happen in threes. ... The Louie family's tragedies arrive in a long and devastating cascade like a waterfall, like a dam burst open, like a tidal wave that breaks, destroys, and then pulls the evidence back to sea. Our men try to act strong, but it is May, Yen-yen, Joy, and I who must steady them and help them bear their pain, anguish, and shame. [pages 228-229]

When I reached the final words of the novel, I found myself hoping to hear more about Pearl's life, her destiny, as well as that of her daughter Joy. I want to know more of these women's stories.

FWD ~ Follow-Up Read

Because I read The Freedom Writers Diary last year, I didn't read it with the Book Buddies in September. But I had hoped to read Erin Gruwell's memoir Teach With Your Heart: Lessons I Learned From the Freedom Writers instead.


As is more often than not the case in my life at present, I was running behind schedule - so I didn't get to Teach With Your Heart until October. I did want to let those who enjoyed The Freedom Writers Diary know that I enjoyed Teach With Your Heart just as well. It's the same story but more from Gruwell's viewpoint than from the students'. (I've posted a brief review on my book blog.)

Books to Consider

I'm still interested in reading the following books that we've considered before:

• Ella Minnow Pea by Mark Dunn



• Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen



• Life as We Knew It by Susan Beth Pfeffer

A few other books on my to-read list that I'd enjoy discussing with the group:

• Book of a Thousand Days by Shannon Hale



• Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher



• The Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic, and Madness at the Fair That Changed America by Erik Larson



• The Last Chinese Chef by Nicole Mones



• Mermaids in the Basement by Michael Lee West



• Grace (Eventually): Thoughts on Faith by Anne LaMott



• The Mermaid Chair by Sue Monk Kidd

I better stop there!

Thoughts from "Beyond the End of Everything" and "A Glimpse of the World's Rough Grace"

(Aren't those section titles just terrific?!)

"Beyond the End of Everything"

While, thankfully, I have never experienced the trauma of having a baby in the NICU or on a respirator - like Anna did with Ellen - and while my husband was present and actively involved in the births of our children - unlike the fathers of Cerise's children, I could still relate so much to many of both mother's feelings at the births of their children. The burdens of motherhood are so powerfully described in this passage about Anna's feelings following Ellen's birth:

And suddenly a million threats suggested themselves to her. It was as though she were still dilated, still open and unfiltered, as though she were a lens that admitted all possible light, and every shadow. She thought of SIDS and AIDS and hidden heart defects, of strange viruses and untended swimming pools, of childhood cancers and E. coli-laden hamburgers. She remembered all the appalling numbers that filled the newspapers, the thousands of extinctions and billions of pounds of toxic chemicals that threatened the world. She thought of global warming, nuclear winter, and silent spring. Clutching the windowsill and staring down on the city stewing in all its ugly light, she wondered how she could ever feel safe again. [p. 146]

"A Glimpse of the World's Rough Grace"

I love the hope expressed in this quote about Cerise: "It was strange how much the world wanted her back. It was strange no one saw the truth of who she was" (p. 242).

What I loved best about Windfalls was its depiction of motherhood as the truly tough, gritty, and on-our-own thing it is. Anna talks to Honey/Cerise about this idea:

Honey's silence seemed like an open door. "We're all so alone, in mothering," Anna went on, her voice low and raw. "We can talk about how our lkids are doing in school and the cute things they say. We can even complain about how they're driving us nuts. But we can't talk about how much it terrifies us to love them as we do, or talk about how much we scare ourselves, trying to stay sane while we raise them. We can't talk about how much they teach us, how much they cost, us, how much we owe to them. Or- " She shrugged. "Maybe it's just me." [p. 297]

My responses to two of the questions:

• What would you do if your house burned down, leaving you homeless and with no material resources at your command?
  
  Thankfully, if my house burned down, I would have both insurance to eventually replace the house as well as money in the bank. While my family would be unable to survive very long without a regular paycheck, we do have a great deal more material resources than Cerise had. Without those, I'd still have a large family to whom I could turn for help, as well as a church community that would lend support. All of those things are blessings that I probably take for granted.



• How was it a good thing that Anna and Cerise met each other at this time in their lives?
  
  The bringing-together of Anna and Cerise was a perfect climax for this book. Symbolic of how women need other women in their lives - even women with very different lifestyles from their own - Anna's and Cerise's relationship brings healing and growth to them both.

Questions from "Because"

Does anybuddy remember the 1970s? When were you in school?

I graduated from high school in 1982, so I guess I'm about the same age as Anna and Cerise. I don't remember a lot about the 1970s, at least not until near the end. I do remember the controversy about the Equal Rights Amendment (ERA) - which failed to be ratified by the extended deadline of June 1982. The women's movement, Roe v. Wade, and ERA are all important parts of U.S. history, and as a feminist, I have read widely about this period of time, even if I don't have a lot of personal memories of it.

Can you relate to either young woman's situation? Do you know someone who has lost a baby? Do you know someone who raised a child alone?

I have never personally experienced either Anna's or Cerise's circumstance. One of my sisters lost her first baby in 1999 - just weeks before my youngest child was born - in a situation similar to that of Anna's grandmother, and another sister lost her six-month-old adopted son to SIDS at the end of 2006, so I do have some sense of the story's feeling of loss. I can't think of anyone I know well who has raised a child alone without having been first married to the child's father, even if only briefly. My own mother raised seven daughters as a single parent, though, so I have a good frame of reference for some of Cerise's experience.

I may be opening a can of worms here, but what's your opinion about abortion?

On the 34th anniversary of Roe v. Wade (January 22, 2007), I wrote a post about my view that a woman's right to choice is non-negotiable. The post is titled "Both Pro-Life and Pro-Choice." I don't think I explain my viewpoint here any better than I did there, so please go check it out.

CB - Final Thoughts

Excerpted from the review I posted on my book blog.

Some concepts explored in the book:

Cultural differences. The importance of literacy and education. The role of women in society. Making a contribution to the world. Interpersonal relationships. Marching to a different drummer.

Three favorite passages:

It was more than a hope; it was an intuition now, or maybe a vow. [page 132]

There were limitations to language, even when it was shared. Sometimes words were not sturdy enough to hold all the needed meaning. She'd discovered that as a child, when she sought to find her mother in the harried and unreachable widow, and she felt it again now. [page 156]

Jwahir's father shook his head. "Those are words from your husband, not you. The issue is values. Ours are not theirs. We respect our ancestors' lessons. I know the name of my father's father's father's father. Do they in the city with their books know this?"

Here, Jwahir was tempted to interrupt, to ask whether he could recall the name of his mother's mother's mother's mother. She knew the answer, though. She'd heard this litany before, along with the recitation of the endless list of male preceded by male preceded by male. As if the women did not exist, except as containers shaped by others' visions, holders of the dreams of fathers, husbands, sons. She felt a surge of irritation coupled with resolve. Like her father, she was traditional. But her father's words fed her conviction that she had to break with tradition on some matters at least. It was right to risk everything to do what she believed, what she desired and needed - as a woman. [page 163]

Something else I liked:

Fiona applies the metaphor of being "a zebra among giraffes" to herself and her situation in African. This idea comes from something she has seen on the African plains - a small herd of giraffes with one zebra among them. "He follows them everywhere," she is told. "Dreaming of being a giraffe?" she asked. "I imagine he lost his family somehow and he's longing to find another one to fit into" is the response.

One last thought:

Fiona tries to learn some of the colloquialisms of the African community she visits. A final one she learns is "fresh water on your cheeks" - expressed to her as part of a good-bye and thank you. I find the phrase endearing.

Questions for the author ~ we've reached the end of the month!

In a comment to the Part Three discussion questions (below), Alison said:

I did finish the book earlier this week. I wish I had had more time this month to post about it, but I will do a post by the weekend about some of my final thoughts.

I do think we need to ask Masha Hamilton if she can do cartwheels!

I'd also love to hear her thoughts about the female circumcision and other women's rights issues (such as polygamy, abuse, status as "property") that are only peripheral to the novel but which provide some context for the importance of education and for Kanika's life goals.

I'll send this to Masha Hamilton later today, waiting for the possibility that somebuddy will have more questions to add. Please, please, please? For the record, Masha joined my face-to-face book club last night via speakerphone ... and I know the answer to the cartwheels question! However, I think I'll let you hear it in her own words.

Final Set of Discussion Questions

I haven't had much time to read this past week. Most nights I've fallen asleep after a paragraph or two, but I finally finished the book last night. Here a few thoughts on the last sections of the book. Because I stopped reading at page 261 before, I'm starting here with the last two questions of set two.

29. Ostensibly, Hanna is the one we are reading about here: "I wanted to give a sense of the people of the book, the different hands that had made it, used it, protected it" (p. pp. 264-265). Since this sentence provides us with a good explanation for the book's title, how well do you think Geraldine Brooks has done in giving us a sense of these people?

I think Brooks has done a good job in giving us a sense of both the Jewish people - whose book it is - and others who made it and protected it. Since I was a young girl, I've been fascinated with Jewish culture, and I greatly enjoyed this novel. I also appreciate the witness born by the book, as Raz explains it to Hanna:

"Well, from what you've told me, the book has survived the same human disaster over and over again. Think about it. You've got a society where people tolerate difference, like Spain in the Convivencia, and everything's humming along: creative, prosperous. Then somehow this fear, this hate, this need to demonize 'the other' - it just sort of rears up and smashes the whole society. Inquisition, Nazis, extremist Serb nationalists ... same old, same old. It seems to me the book, at this point, bears witness to all that" (p. 195).

30. Were you expecting the death of Alia (p. 270)? Or had you hoped for a happy ending, in spite of Ozren's words to Hanna, "Not every story has a happy ending" (p. 37)?

To be honest, I hadn't thought too much about Alia since Hanna left Sarajevo. But his death felt like it fit with what else was happening - and it was absolutely necessary to give motive for Ozren's later actions.

33. "Too finely dressed to be a servant, and fully participating in the Jewish rite, the identity of that African woman in saffron has perplexed the book's scholars for a century" (p. 20). When I read that, I made a note: "Okay, I'm hooked; I want to know who this woman is." Now we know (p. 315). Who is she, and why is she in the picture?

I love that Zahra put herself into this picture. To me it's part of the witness of the Sarajevo Haggadah - as well as the message of People of the Book: the importance and value in accepting and celebrating our common humanity.

35. What a way to reconnect with Lola, having her discover something hidden in the museum in Israel. Was this discovery a miracle? Or was it beyond believable to you?

Almost unbelievable, I think, but I'm pretty much able to accept these kinds of coincidences in the novels I read - and it did bring us full circle to Lola's girlhood with Serif Kamal and his efforts to save the book.

36. "What skills could you possibly have, darling?" (pp. 343). Could you imagine Hanna's mother saying such a thing, even though she's trying to keep Hanna off the board of the Sharansky Foundation? Hanna responded in exasperation, "How is it ... that a man like Aaron Sharansky could have loved someone like you?" (p. 344). Is their mother-daughter relationship believable? What did you think about Hanna's decision to "change my name to Sharansky" (p. 345). Do you think they can ever heal the rift?

The turmoil in the relationship between Hanna and her mother is believable to me, and it has such deep roots that I don't know if they'll ever be able to heal the rift. It's a sad situation, because they could be each other's greatest supporters.

37. How would you feel if you'd changed your whole professional life six years ago, and now discovered you had been right all along?

Vindicated, I guess, but extremely frustrated. All the self-doubt that Hanna had for those six years! But she was able to do some other great things that she probably wouldn't have done - so it wasn't really wasted time.

Second Set of Discussion Questions

I need to get back to reading - I stopped at page 261 - but here a few thoughts on some of the questions from the second set:

25. Will all humans someday be blended, like Raz (p. 141)? Is this the direction humanity is going?

As the mother of three bi-racial children, I am in favor of "blending." I think that some of the prejudices and divisions in our society can be overcome this way, as we come to better recognize our common humanity as well as continue to celebrate our diversity.

26. Delilah Sharansky, the Jewish woman introduced on page 202, died in the accident that hospitalized Hanna's mother. Why do you think Sarah Heath never told Hanna about Delilah or her son, the artist Aaron Sharansky? Hanna is very hurt by this lack of knowledge: "It was going to take me more than one night to catch up with thirty years of missing information. Missing love. ... in the end, she'd made all the decisions, and I'd paid for them" (p. 213). And again, "Why hadn't she told me?" (p. 261).

While Hanna's mother isn't a particularly sympathetic character, I would like to think that she thought that she was doing the right thing by keeping this secret - perhaps believing that Hanna was better off not knowing about this part of her family so she wouldn't be hurt by the possibility of losing them (like Hanna's mother had lost Aaron).

27. What did you think of the story of Ruti, daughter of David Ben Shoushan and his wife Miriam? Ruti was enthralled by the text, the words, the meaning of the words. Ruti understood the text, "They will build me a temple and I will dwell in them," to mean, "In them, not in it. [God] would dwell within her. She would be the house of God. The house of transcendence" (p. 234).

Ruti's story reminded me a bit of Yentl. I was almost going to say that I've liked Ruti's story the best of the background stories so far - but then I had to change my mind because I really liked Lola's too. They are both such strong young women.

First Set of Discussion Questions

As I mentioned before, because the library "hold" list for People of the Book is so long, I decided to order the book from amazon.com and it arrived earlier this week. It's been a busy week, but I got finally got quite a bit read last night and this morning. Here are a few of my thoughts on the first set of discussion questions. (I've skipped question 7 as I've already read past the place in the book where we learn the answer.)

1. We've met two main characters: Dr. Hanna Heath and Dr. Ozren Karaman (Muslim). What do you think of Hanna? What do you think of Dr. Ozren Karaman, "a thin young man in faded blue jeans" (p. 13)?

I like both characters, and I think Brooks did a nice job giving us a good sense of who they are in not too many pages, both from their interaction with each other as well as the description of their relationships with others, Hanna's mother and Ozren's son, specifically.

2. When I reached the words: "And then he handed me the book" (p. 13), I wrote this note: "Oooh, I wonder what that must have felt like, to know you are holding such a treasure!" If you click on Mary Zorro's link, you have the closest we can get here at Book Buddies to having the book in our hands: looking at it page by page. What do you think of those illustrations?

My initial response upon seeing the illustrations was a feeling of connection through time to those who created them and all those who have also seen them.

3. Hanna believes, "Change. That's the enemy. Books do best when temperature, humidity, the whole environment, stay the same" (p. 13). See what change has done to the actual Haggadah by looking at the UN photo Mary Zorro found. Have you ever been dismayed at what's happened to an old book you have seen? Tell us about it.

I have a few books that belonged to my mother when she was a child. Obviously those books are nowhere near as old as the Sarajevo Haggadah, but they are not in good shape, although I still treasure them.

4. I love my books for what they SAY, not for their physical properties. Book collectors value a book for itself, the THING, not the words inside. I can see value in both views. Tell us what you value about books.

I think that I first and foremost value books for what they say, and yet I'm reluctant to abandon "real" books for the new electronic versions because I love how a book "feels" and "looks" - so I guess there is something about the physical aspects that appeal to me too.

5. "Kunta Kinte" (p. 28) ... do you remember (or know about) Alex Haley's 1976 book Roots, which became a 12-hour TV mini-series in 1977? Could we say this novel is about the "roots" of a book?

I was still a child when Roots was on TV and wasn't very interested in watching it. I haven't read the book either. But I certainly am aware of the feelings that Roots generated among many people about genealogical research and finding out who we are from we came from. I like the idea of this novel as being about the "roots" of a book.

6. Hanna believes that "if something can be known, I can't stand not knowing it" (p. 41). Can you understand that feeling? What were you thinking when Hanna implored Ozren to get a second opinion on Alia's condition and he becomes angry, saying, "Not every story has a happy ending" (p. 37)?

I can relate to both feelings - wanting to know and believing that we have to let go and walk into the darkness. The trick, I think, is realizing which is appropriate in a given circumstance.

8. What did you think of Lola's adventures? Did it make sense to you when the young man told Lola, "The only true home for Jews is Eretz Israel" (p. 50)?

I loved the character of Lola and this part of the story, so heart-breaking and yet so filled with hope. I believe in the concept of a "gathering of Israel" so the idea of Eretz Israel being "the only true home for Jews" fits with my worldview.

9. What did you think about Stela and Serif Kamal, the Albanian Muslims Lola met?

The goodness of people is a touching thing. From the first time that Lola met Stela to the later period when they cared for her, I was moved by the nurture by the Kamals for this girl so different from them, so "other."

10. Why do you think the Nazis were intent on destroying Jewish books? Could something like that happen today?

The hatred that the Nazis had for the Jews was so pervasive that they wanted to wipe out the fact of their entire existence. It's so hard for me to understand the depth of that hatred. It's also hard for me to understand the depth of the hatred that some people have even today about certain books, about particular concepts or ideas. I think ultimately both must be based on fear.

I'm on page 145 of the book now. I can no longer find the reading schedule that I thought I saw here previously, but I'm ready for further discussion!

Some Additional Thoughts

I finished the book earlier this week and have been thinking a lot about it since. Here are a few thoughts on Bonnie's second set of discussion questions:

9. Some of the Book Buddies have seemed to dislike the use of the puns Out-With and Fury. For me, they are central to the power of the book. (I've commented about this a little already.) In understanding the puns, we recognize the setting of the book - but the use of the puns makes it possible to extrapolate the book's message not only to war settings other than Auschwitz but also - and more significant to me - to other situations in which we put up a fence and put people whom we wish to be "out with" on the other side of the fence or in which our hatred for those different from us creates furious destruction and violence (either literal or figurative). I think Boyne's use of these puns is ingenious!

7 and 10. The striped pajamas put Bruno into the "shoes" of Shmuel. One of the most profound passages from the book comes after Bruno puts on the pajamas and crawls under the fence to the other side (p. 208):

'I don't think I like it here,' said Bruno after a while.
'Neither do I,' said Shmuel.

Bruno's father also wears a costume - one in which he is unable to think for himself and to question the orders he receives.

11 and 12. The Boy in the Striped Pajamas can be read as a simple young adult historical fiction novel, but I think that it is much more. My thesaurus says that fable, allegory, and parable are synonyms, each meaning "a story intended to teach a basic truth or moral about life." To me, that is what this book is. (I can understand the feeling that some Book Buddies have had that calling this story a "fable" is not appropriate, but I think that is only if we view that label as synonymous with "myth" - which is a related but different word, particularly in this context.) It is because the book is a fable that it has great power - power to make us contemplate its message, power to alter our thinking, power to stay with us for a long time.

What I Think So Far

I read up through Chapter 10 and then stopped so that the second half of the book wouldn't color my view of the first half. Here are a few of my thoughts on some of Bonnie's discussion questions:

1. I guess, as the mother of an eight-and-a-half-year-old boy, I didn't think that Bruno seemed younger than nine. He is the embodiment of innocence in the tale though. I haven't quite decided what Gretel embodies - maybe apathy or self-centeredness? They certainly serve as contrasts to one another.

2. Because this is a fable, rather than an accurate yet fictional depiction of this time and place in history, it would not be appropriate, in my opinion, for Gretel to be involved in the politics of the situation.

4. Bruno's father's statement that "they’re not people at all" is a very powerful summary of the underlying message of the book. Two other scenes from the book (so far) expand that idea well: The situation with Pavel helping Bruno after he gets hurt on the tire swing (pp. 77-85), and the discussion Bruno has with Herr Liszt about their contrasting views on the value of books (pp. 97-98).

5. I love the character of Bruno's grandmother! She's the voice of conscience, of knowing what is right and what is wrong - but no one is listening. Instead, they are more concerned with power and prestige.